Saturday, August 24, 2013

Failed Outreach

Last Sunday I was driving on a highway in PJ. I was on my way back from church and the dark sky hinted the coming of a storm. As I was getting closer to my house, suddenly my thought went out to those who are waiting for the bus at the bus stop. I know how they feel. It doesn't feel good when you see the rain about to fall and the bus that you have waited for long is still nowhere to be seen. It isn't nice at all.

So as I was reaching, my eyes were sweeping through the pedestrians on the pavement beside the highway. And I saw these 3 people. I scanned through their facial expression, expecting them to somewhat look worried.

And then it was that moment I was surprised. I actually know one of those 3 people!

I had never seen that guy (well, let's call him Alex) since I left my college 4 years ago. It has truly been a while. Alex did come to my mind within these 4 years time. Seeing him reminded me of the days when we were in Taylor's College Christian Fellowship. Yes, it wasn't a university back then. Alex found about our CF and he has then been faithfully attending ever since.
The interesting thing about this person is that he had difficulty in socializing. This ended up him being an outcast. A lot of us didn't know what to do. We didn't know how to show our love. We didn't know how to cope with his 'intrusion' into our lives. The steering committee tried our best to accept him in the most natural setting while trying to make other members comfortable of his presence.

It wasn't easy. Or maybe I wasn't good enough to come out with something.

After a few months, we got this news from Alex. Alex couldn't continue with his studies with Taylor's any longer. He had to go. He left us.

Personally, I felt relieved then. It felt like out of a sudden I don't have to face this situation anymore. It felt as if God heard our wishes and took him away. However I do feel sad for him at the same time.

It saddened me even more when I saw that Alex looked almost the same today as how he was 4 years ago. He doesn't look happy. He doesn't dress neatly. I don't know what he had gone through.

Now, the question is, am I be able to love him more than I used to if we ever meet face to face again?

I used to partially reject him through my actions and words. I didn't love and accept him wholeheartedly. Can I do better now after 4 years time?

Oh God have mercy on me.

Lord I really pray that you will bless Alex and continue to mold him. Send your people to teach and guide him. I failed to leave any impact in his life. I hope someone would do better than me. Lord send that person to Alex's family and change the situation around. In Jesus' name, amen.
Opposite Hang Jebat's grave, Melaka. August 2013.
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